[W T Clark]

Yes, original. "little one" makes the sentimentality sacharine, but Nemo's suggestion and your use of "something" and "somewhere" was a good change.

Hope this helps.

[Jim Moonan]

.
Thank you Jan. I agree it is all that. Have you read the original?

So now I’m left to go back, study my own poem in its original incarnation, and rediscover why it arrived as it did and why it needs nothing more (other than a few tweaked words). It is a strange journey to go back to a poem I created, then hastily abandoned, to recapture it, reclaim it as the purest. I will say this: when I posted it I thought it was perfect.

All of this is immensely gratifying. Just the act of shepherding a poem to come home gives me everything I need and want.

.