[basil ransome-davies]

You nailed that one, Marion.

[Roger Slater]

Thanks for the kind feedback on my "How To" entry. I've sent it off.

Marion's brilliant winner sent me off failing to top her in the worm department. Here's my attempt [NOTE: I've edited this and posted the newer version below]:

"You couldn't find a worm on a rotting corpse," his classmates used to mock him, but this endless teasing only steeled his resolve to become the world's foremost hunter of caterpillars, centipedes, entozoons and maggots. Laboring in obscurity until being named Person of the Year by Time Magazine in 1994, the "Wizard of Worms" was forced to retire in 2003 after being injured in a fluke encounter with a rabid annelid he ultimately managed to slaughter, have stuffed, and mount on the wall above his hearth. Afterthoughts of a Wormhunter tells his story in slithering detail. Bite down on this worm, you're guaranteed to be hooked.

[FOsen]

When an infectious book blurb fastens itself onto the back of an unwitting host, (the curiously named but comparatively stolid Afterthoughts of a Worm Hunter), you’re along for a whirlwind tour through the juicier parts of human parasitology that doesn’t let up until nothing but a dried-out husk of the larger book remains (spoiler alert - the first axiom of worm hunting ought to be, why bother? first you hunt the worms, then you die; then the worms hunt you). But, no matter, because by this time our plucky little blurb is in your hands, and we’ll bet you’re already itching to get your itching, suppurating digits on the soon-to-be-published sequel, Afterthoughts of a Worm Hunter Reader. Already #13 on the WHO’s “Gone Viral” list, look for it soon!
frank

[Roger Slater]

I've edited my previous "worm" blurb:

“You couldn't find a maggot on a rotting corpse," his schoolmates used to mock him when he spoke of his ambitions, but the worm soon turned and he grew up to become history’s foremost hunter of caterpillars, centipedes, and entozoons. Feared and respected throughout the animal kingdom, the mere mention of his name is enough to make any annelid squirm.

The self-proclaimed "Wizard of Worms" was forced to retire in 2003 after losing both his legs in a dramatic scuffle with a wily millipede. “I may have lost two legs,” he boasts, “but the millipede lost six hundred.”

He now spends his time helping fishermen bait hooks. This is his story.

[Julie Steiner]

Aw. I miss the "fluke encounter". But we have to kill our darlings, don't we?

[Julie Steiner]

In one corner, the indomitable human spirit. In the other, the forces of downsizing, sadism, and autocracy. Your employer's annual report? No, I Was Tortured by the Pygmy Love Queen!

The corporate catchphrase "Small is beautiful" never seemed so sinister.

[Philip Quinlan]

Afterthoughts of a Wormhunter is, quite simply, the greatest story nema tode.

[Marion Shore]

I was Tortured by the Pygmy Love Queen (Oprah's Book Club 64)

Justin Cameron has it all: successful career, beautiful fiancée, luxurious Manhattan apartment. Everything seems perfect—until loud music from a neighbor’s apartment keeps him awake at night. When he bangs on the door, he meets Kacey, the lead singer of the all-girl heavy metal band "The Pygmy Love Queen," --and Justin’s well-ordered existence is turned upside down. The critics have called I was Tortured by the Pygmy Love Queen "a delightful take on the classic ‘odd couple’ motif” (Boston Globe), “breezy…sexy” (Cosmopolitan), “a witty, engaging comedy of manners; what Jane Austen might have written had she lived among the contemporary thirty-something scene.” (NY Times)

[Petra Norr]

Right on, Marion, and write on! Both of yours are great.
I had a hard time coming up with anything for the pygmy queen. So I took the easy route out...

I was Tortured by the Pygmy Love Queen

Never mind. (-:

[Marion Shore]

Thanks Petra.

But really, I've gotta stop! I spent so much time on this, I feel like I might as well write the whole damn book.