Eratosphere Forums - Metrical Poetry, Free Verse, Fiction, Art, Critique, Discussions Able Muse - a review of poetry, prose and art

Forum Left Top

Notices

Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Unread 05-03-2021, 03:48 PM
Duncan Gillies MacLaurin's Avatar
Duncan Gillies MacLaurin Duncan Gillies MacLaurin is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Saeby, Denmark
Posts: 3,227
Default May Snakeskin

I have a couple of pieces in this month's Snakeskin. I would like to thank people here for their feedback on my translation, both recently (via PM) and when I posted an early version on the Translation Board fifteen years ago.

Joe Crocker has a piece in there too.

Duncan
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Unread 05-04-2021, 04:03 AM
Joe Crocker Joe Crocker is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2020
Location: York
Posts: 659
Default

Spherean Robin Helweg-Larsen (editor of the Potcake Chapbooks) also has a poem in this month's Snakeskin

Last edited by Joe Crocker; 05-04-2021 at 05:05 AM. Reason: link added
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Unread 05-04-2021, 11:22 AM
David Callin David Callin is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Ellan Vannin
Posts: 3,335
Default

Yes, I saw these. Well done both. Some bravura rhyming in your oxygen poem, Duncan.

And I've seen yours before, here, Joe. Is it much changed from what it was? Or not at all?

David
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Unread 05-04-2021, 02:34 PM
Joe Crocker Joe Crocker is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2020
Location: York
Posts: 659
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by David Callin View Post

I've seen yours before, here, Joe. Is it much changed from what it was? Or not at all?

David
Hi David

My “Apocalypse Now” poem has changed a fair bit since I put it up for criticism here a few weeks ago. The consensus then was that poem was playing too much with surface references to the film and not saying very much new or original. Which was a little dispiriting but undeniably accurate.

However, I did very much enjoy playing with the references, images and quotes and trying to weave them into a villanelle that encapsulated my experience of the film. So I decided to make a virtue out of superficiality and crammed in even more of them.

But I did take on board several comments that people made. The Snakeskin version now stands back a bit more and looks at how we, the audience, have reacted to the movie as a spectacle.

When Snakeskin said they were having a special issue called "Breathe", it seemed to fit the rubric.

Is it any better? (You don't have to answer that!)
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Unread 05-04-2021, 07:02 PM
Allen Tice's Avatar
Allen Tice Allen Tice is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Brooklyn, NY USA
Posts: 6,119
Default

Duncan, I've drifted toward a very strange reading of Catchin Yer Eye that deepens it. Ineffable affection and worry perhaps. Right reading or wrong reading, it's still very good and quite interesting.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Unread 05-04-2021, 08:35 PM
Duncan Gillies MacLaurin's Avatar
Duncan Gillies MacLaurin Duncan Gillies MacLaurin is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Saeby, Denmark
Posts: 3,227
Default

Cheers, David and Allen!

That sounds about right, Allen.

Duncan
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Unread 05-06-2021, 11:20 AM
David Callin David Callin is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Ellan Vannin
Posts: 3,335
Default

Hey Joe (where you going with that pun in your hand? Sorry, I must be thinking about your carp poem).

I'm glad to hear the poem has changed a fair bit. (Great British turn of phrase, that, isn't it? I think of it as British anyway.) I wasn't that enthused by it when it appeared here, in an earlier incarnation, but I think you've improved it a fair bit. You've let light and air into it, to its benefit. (Not sure about the nod to Old Possum though.)

Cheers

David
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Unread 05-06-2021, 04:49 PM
Joe Crocker Joe Crocker is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2020
Location: York
Posts: 659
Default

Thank you David. I’ll take “improved a fair bit”. The Elliot references to ragged claws and hollow men were both in the film, though perhaps rather clunkily crowbarred into my version

So are you a Hendrix fan or do you like the cracking bass-line hippy Love version?
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Unread 05-07-2021, 12:54 PM
David Callin David Callin is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Ellan Vannin
Posts: 3,335
Default

Ah look at me. I had completely forgotten - in fact I still don't remember - the Eliot references in the film. Interesting.

I'm not especially a Hendrix fan- "Hey Joe" is unavoidable, either way - but I am a big Forever Changes fan. I didn't know Love had done this. I think they made a great job of it. Thanks for the introduction to it.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



Forum Right Top
Forum Left Bottom Forum Right Bottom
 
Right Left
Member Login
Forgot password?
Forum LeftForum Right


Forum Statistics:
Forum Members: 8,399
Total Threads: 21,839
Total Posts: 270,784
There are 2944 users
currently browsing forums.
Forum LeftForum Right


Forum Sponsor:
Donate & Support Able Muse / Eratosphere
Forum LeftForum Right
Right Right
Right Bottom Left Right Bottom Right

Hosted by ApplauZ Online