[John Whitworth]

This was a competition in Poetry Review, no less, way back then. I didn't win. However...

No. 2825: picture this

Rossetti used to append sonnets to his paintings, e.g., ‘Found’ (for a picture). You are invited to supply a poem, not necessarily a sonnet, for a well-known painting of your choice (16 lines maximum). Please email entries, wherever possible, to lucy@spectator.co.uk by midday on 20 November.

[Brian Allgar]

And the NS set exactly this competition last year (No. 4224). There must be quite a few left-overs knocking around ...

[John Whitworth]

Just how well-known is well-known?

Picasso: Old Man with Guitar

Not as deaf as a post nor as blind as a bat,
Nor as drunk as skunk on a spree,
Nor as daft as a brush, nor as drowned as a rat,
Nor as blind as a post, nor as deaf as a bat,
Nor as black as a sheet, nor as white as my hat,
Nor demonstrably out of my tree,
Not a brat, nor a prat nor a terrible twat,
I’m as cool as a cat, I’m much better than that,
I’m as feisty and fit as a flea.
I’m as busy and buzzy and brisk as a bee,
And I travel on coaches and buses for free.

[Lance Levens]

Time Transfixed:The Billionaire's Perspective

This Magritte is so damned weird: I just don't comprehend it,
but wifey digs the friggin' thing and won't end all the whining.
So I haul the Gallic monster home--I'm not about to send it--
I'm hoping in the fairy dust there's a Wall Street silver lining.

But it smokes up the guest pools through out my Roman villa;
it smokes up the Flemmish hangings, kills my wealth of ties.
Sweet smoke, nut smoke, chocolate and vanilla--
it's verite, it's realiste, it's cosmogonic lies.

It's the oracle at Delphi and a rub to every Roman;
It's smoking out my sub-desires, a constant coughing fit.
I'm on the street and on my knees to every passing woman,
wailing for forgiveness and praising woman wit.

I wandered out one sullen night and hopped the gravy train.
There were watches timing every stone and pancaked off of trees.
The engine sprouted Frenchy wings and tongued up through the rain.
Perhaps Magritte was cogent: all the two's about are three's.

[Jayne Osborn]

And the NS set exactly this competition last year (No. 4224).

I've just re-read your winning entry, Brian, (as Nicholas Holbrook). It's hilarious -- and you got two Hon Menshes!

Ah... but can you pull off a similar stunt to mine, and win the NS and The Speccie with the same poem? (I did it with The Oldie and The Speccie, which was probably an easier feat, to be fair.)

Give it a try. It's such a fun poem it's worthy of winning again!

Jayne

[Brian Allgar]

Originally Posted by Jayne Osborn

I've just re-read your winning entry, Brian, (as Nicholas Holbrook). It's hilarious -- and you got two Hon Menshes!

Errr ... only one mensh, Jayne. Perhaps (as someone else did recently) you're confusing Sylvia Fairley with my sister, Sylvia Smith?

[Rob Stuart]

It's a shame you're not Sylvia Fairley, Brian. She seems to do quite well with these things.

[Adrian Fry]

We're always slating the NS for setting hard comps but this one isn't easy. We're not asked for a poem about the painting. What seems to be called for is a poem the artist has attached to the poem. In which case, are we to imagine that the artist has written the poem (Whistler grovelling to his mum might be fun)?

[Orwn Acra]

So, they're not looking for ekphrastic?

[Jayne Osborn]

Adrian,
I see it as "a poem... for a well-known painting of your choice" can be written by anybody, rather than "What seems to be called for is a poem the artist has attached to the poem" (I think you meant attached to the painting).

But there's nothing wrong with the Whistler idea.

Jayne

Cross-posted with Walter. No, ekphrastic isn't necessarily what they're after (as I see it) though it could fit the rubric, I suppose.