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Unread 09-13-2021, 02:04 AM
Julie Steiner Julie Steiner is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: San Diego, CA, USA
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I would cut the Lino Ventura sentence, so that the hard-drinking author sentence leads right into the father's bourbon and water reference, thus setting up the later observations on the nature of fiction. And I'm not sure about the bourbon and water "tinted" jaw, but maybe I'm just too unfamiliar with bourbon. Otherwise, spot on, all of them.

Last edited by Julie Steiner; 09-13-2021 at 02:08 AM.
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