I think I'm worse when I'm trying to be better, but here's what I quickly came up with:
THANK YOU, I'LL STAND
It makes me groan to sit on stone.
Unless there is a cushion
plumped up there upon the chair
I will not put my toosh in.
I'm on my guard when seats are hard.
I don't mean to sound whiney,
but I can't bear the sort of chair
that hurts my tender hiney.
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