Thread: Season of lambs
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Unread 04-20-2024, 11:24 AM
John Boddie John Boddie is offline
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David –
I read this several times, enjoying it a bit more with each reading. It seems to me to be a comment on the way that lives move from spontaneity to measured order.

You might consider removing the first “white” in S2.

The shift in focus from the sheep to the fields in S3 seemed a bit abrupt to me

It was interesting to see reference to sextons and “hundredth” in S4, but I felt it was making reference to “hundreds”, a classic measurement of land area in the time when everyone knew what a sexton was, namely a groundskeeper (and gravedigger) at a church.

All in all, I feel this has promise.

JB
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