Former Taoiseach Bertie Ahern explained that Ireland's bank crash of 2008 was not, as had been widely believed, down to a combination of banking greed, political inefficiency and developers' irresponsibility but rather due to overspending by 'Joe and Mary Soap.'

We thought that greedy bankers were the reason
our dear old Celtic tiger fled in terror.
We called for them to go on trial for treason
but it transpires that would have been an error,
for Bertie has revealed the misanthropes
that caused such untold hardship, were the Soaps.

We blamed the politicians for inaction
and threatened to frogmarch them to a quarry.
But now it seems that was the wrong reaction
and we should all line up and mumble ‘Sorry.’
Seemingly, the ones that stoked false hope
were those two bastards, Joe and Mary Soap.

And all those nice developers and builders -
a pox on us for daring to accuse them.
Bertie’s revelations now have filled us
with self-reproach that we did once abuse them.
The greed that pushed us down the slippery slope
was all the work of Joe and Mary Soap.

Oh, Joe and Mary Soap, we can’t forgive them
for dragging this proud country through the mangle.
Their heinous crimes will doubtless long outlive them –
we ought to string them up and watch them dangle.
Alas, we can’t afford a length of rope –
the legacy of Joe and Mary Soap.

Splendid, Peter.

It’s a problem for Bertie Ahern -
Tiger cubs are reluctant to learn.
Restive in their cage
They give in to rage
And ringmasters they'll turn on or spurn.

http://www.wsj.com/articles/trump-lo...ort-1450275439

Trumpery Golfery
Donald’s gone blustery
Blowing like billy-o
Ever so hard

But all his windy blow
Won’t make the turbines go
That will take more than a
Little petard.

We know that Attila the Trump
talks trash all the time on the stump.
Not to say that this matters,
but the grass where he spatters
stays now and forever a dump.

Here, in North Yorkshire, the last deep-mined coal pit in England has just closed at Killingley. During the highly politicised '80s strike, it was the scene of fierce battles with strike-breaking police. The management has already refused any approaches by the miners for a buy-out. It is seven miles from the largest coal-fired power station in England.

HOW KELLINGLEY GOT THE BLUES

The mining is over, the pit lies deserted.
They tell the same story – it’s the nth time you’ve heard it.
It’s not the beginning, familiar abuse
dished out by the ‘markets’, endorsed by the Blues.

The CVs you send out, one after another,
won’t create your new job, that’s gone somewhere or other.
You’re only turnin’, a hand set to lose,
for this is the stacked deck, that’s run by the Blues.

When you're at home alone,
Their smugness taunts you constantly.
When at the Job Centre,
Their humbug scars your dignity.

The nights when you don’t sleep, the whole night you’re dying.
Though you can’t forget pride, there’s small future in trying.
You marched for it once, and wore out your shoes.
Let poor people break, that’s the creed of the Blues.

When you're at home alone,
Their fake ‘green’ taunts you constantly.
When you're out in a crowd,
It’s now a ghost community.

Mornings when you surface, to find darkness flying,
you can’t crave pit blackness, it made life soul-denying.
You’ll face your future, with nowt left to lose.
It’s a tough heart that breaks, when ruled by the Blues.

okeydokey
 

Now Cruz Missile Ted’s on the push
To put Donald right out on his tush.
Ohio’s the place
Where their wild clown-car race
Might end in a tangle of Bush.

Nigel, pit closure helps, say other tongues,
To end a legacy of ruined lungs.

Though not in Poland and other sources of cheap coal presumably.

My life’s best ever friend said,
To his Dad, who had worked the pit-head,
“Do you think that the last Welsh pit’s death
You’ll regret when at your last breath?” –
And here verse breaks down,
For I just musn’t clown,
With exactly what that old Commie said,
“Not really Dai. Should have been closed years ago. Filthy bloody job.”

Returned to the shop for repairs.

Poor Jeb lost the candidacy:
“My brother’s ingratitude? Gee!
To help him get Dad’s
Job, I dimpled his chads.
But what did he do to help me?”

With no brother to help him to cheat,
Jeb admits that he’s finally beat.
And his web site? He blew it,
Forgot to renew it –
“I bought it!” jeers Trump in a tweet.

********************************

Scalia is dead! This event,
Leaves no doubt that the President’s meant
To appoint a new judge,
But the Senate won’t budge –
They’d refuse both advice and consent.

********************************

Yes, the Donald knows how to invent
Vicious lies to incite discontent.
Though he’s boastful and shifty,
His ‘groupies’ score fifty -
That’s, roughly, IQ and percent.